Slow Start
On Monday mornings, I feel this urge to hit the ground running. New week, lots to do! My mind advises, its tone seemingly responsible but bordering on manic. The underlying thoughts are obvious, when I stop long enough to go one level deeper:
The early bird catches the worm!
There are only so many worms to catch!
You’d better get out there and catch that worm!
There’s so much to DO!
You’re going to miss the boat.
You need to get out there and chase success.
Go go go go go! Time is running out.
If you’re not in a state of adrenalised action, you’re not doing it right.
It feels surreal and stupid putting words to this energy, as if I am exaggerating. But the thread of urgency is not an exaggeration at all; it feels real, as if something bad will happen if I don’t start the week in fifth gear.
I wonder if you relate?
I also wonder, this morning, about the importance of pushing back against the grind culture and instead allowing myself to have a slow start – especially today, when my body is telling me that I’m tired, and when, rather than ploughing my way through a to-do list, I have other things on my mind that want some attention. Things like writing.
I don’t know about you, but for me this kind of approach feels indulgent and wrong, somehow. The “do, do, do” message is deeply engrained.
It’s not that I want to do nothing. I just don’t want what I do to be driven by my lizard brain, by a sense of reactivity and mild panic about time running out. I want the way I spend my day to come from a deliberate place, a place of choice and intention.
The words don’t feel like they’re flowing well today. I haven’t been writing much recently, so this is part of the deal. But I’m here, and I’m giving it a half-arsed go, and that’s better than doing nothing at all.
Really, all I wanted to say was that I’m going to give myself a slow start. It feels important on many levels. We are still in what Nick Cave calls a “collective catastrophe”. Today, it is grey and raining. It is not a binary either-or choice. Things will get done today. Just not at 8:31 in the morning.